Thursday, October 22, 2009

"Oh, I see you forgot to put your filter in this morning!!"

Well, I am sure it is the beginning of a million comments that I will hear in regards to Max, and I know I will get a backbone and less emotional as time goes on, but it AMAZES me what people will let come flying out of their mouths!!!  We laugh and say these people forgot to put their filter in...the one that filters out all the stupid, non PC, insensitive things that they say.
Two examples, the first not a big deal and didn't upset me.  The second that upset me immensely, more than I could have imagined!
A few weeks ago at a birthday party, one of the moms who doesn't know about Max's LP status said "WOW!! he's 2/12 months!! He's so little!"  But she said it with the tone in her voice of "what is wrong with him??"  I just shrugged and, at this age, felt no need to explain.  Now what she said was not bad at all, but the tone she said it in implied something was wrong with him...I would never say anything like that to someone.  She clearly left her filter at home that day.
The second example really upset me.  We were at the opening of the new hospital in our area and I was talking with a woman who had known my husbands family for years, mostly politically but socially as well.  I had met her many times over the years.  She was adoring little Max, who was hanging off the front of me in the Chicco carrier.  He was full of smiles for her and was so attentive.  We got to talking about having kids and how many and she brought up the Dugger Family with 19 kids.  We were wondering how anyone can afford 19 kids and she said that being on TV probably helps a lot.  Then we briefly mentioned Jon and Kate Plus 8 as well.  I then said (honestly thinking she may already know about Max's conditions) "that TLC has some really good programs on, like that Little People Big World." and she said (I can honestly feel the venom rising up inside of my chest right now as I remember how I felt when she said it....deep breaths!!)...so she said "Oh, the show about the midgets.  Oh, I know they don't like being called that..."  so I, stunned, put my hands gently over Max's head (who is now sleeping looking so angelic laying on my chest in the carrier) and say "well, you know, Max is a little person.....and, although I was unaware of this before I had Max, they Little People community really finds that word to very degrading...."  She looks oblivious, gets accidently bumped from somebody behind us and joins their conversation...No, "gee I'm sorry to have said something so insensitive" or, "excuse me while I pull my foot out of my mouth"....I honestly think she is one of those people who just says what she wants and doesn't have a clue!!!  And I say, KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE!!  If you find it necessary to say something negative, (which we should all NOT DO!!) at least make sure you are not insulting the person you are talking to!!!  So, there I am, standing in the middle of about 100 people crammed into the center of the new hospital lobby and I am uncontrollably upset. Eric was standing by me but was not privy to any of that conversation.  I had to excuse myself and rush out of the room.  It would have been one thing if she had just used the word midget...but to follow it up with "I know THEY don't like to be called that"...Like 'THEY' are a disease...AND if you KNOW that, than DON'T use the word!!  Unfortunately, this is an individual that will probably NEVER get it.  I do give myself credit for educating her about why NOT to use that word.  She clearly forgot to put her filter in!!...
I was so upset about this and I know, in time, I will get used to the comments and the stares but I'm sure it will still hurt.  But honestly, thus far, the absolute majority of the people who I have told about Max have been so supportive and wonderful.  Our family and friends are so excited to know a Little Person and to meet other wonderful people they may have never had the opportunity to meet before Max.  Max is such a blessing!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Computer Meltdown!

Ugh!!  I was having some really annoying problems with my Mac recently, mostly related to iTunes and my iPhone.  I took both my Mac desktop (which is HUGE) and my iPhone to the Genius Bar yesterday and it took about 2 hours for them to (hopefully) get it fixed.  They were afraid they were going to have to wipe the Mac totally clean and start over if they couldn't get it fixed...ugh!!!  So, he created a new user for me and now I have NO IDEA where all my stuff is and how to find it!!  I am so confused!!  The Genius was stumped for awhile and said he has NEVER seen this problem before, but at the same time, he was excited to have something new and different to challenge him.  He was a self admitted GEEK! (his words not mine!!).  But whatever he wants to call himself, to me he will always be a GENIUS for getting my computer working again...now I just have to figure out how to find everything...wish me luck!!

Friday, October 16, 2009

Friday, October 9, 2009

Rainy day...

Well, it is such a rainy, gloomy day today. Max is napping in my lap
(see pic :-). I have lots of laundry to fold and put away and dishes
to do (and the list goes on and on...), but is there anything better
than snuggling with an adorable baby? I don't think so:-).

Thursday, October 1, 2009

What you talkin' about Willis?


Contemplating the meaning of life


And... All snug as a bug in a rug!!


Hanging out before bedtime


My Goofy big boy!!!


Max's Two Month Well Child Check

Max had his 2 month (!!) well child check on Monday with Dr. Phelps.  Of course, we have already been seen by Johns Hopkins and by Dr. Ain (Ortho) recently, so this appointment wasn't going to tell us much more.  He weighed in at 11#10oz and was 22 inches long (!).  I am guessing most of the growth was in his torso though...I have not really noticed his legs growing much (they are still so adorable though!!).  His head circumference was about 40.8cm, which is still on the small side for achondroplasia.  So many parents and even other little people at the conference last weekend commented that his head is so small for achondroplasia.  I know this can change at any time though, which is why they recommend having his head circumference measured every month (Dr. Ain thought that was overkill and recommended every other month...I will do every month though...because I am neurotic like that!!).  I was going to split up his immunizations a little so that he wouldn't get so many shots in one day and because there is a small part of me that IS worried about all the aluminum and mercury that is used as preservatives in the shots.  I was planning on doing the Dr. Sears Immunization schedule.  He recommends not giving them all at once, but instead, getting shots every month.  He also pushes back the MMR and a few others, I think.  The problem with that schedule, is that it would have pushed back the Hemophilus influenza B (Hib) and the Pneumovax (for Pneumococcus).  With Max having a higher risk for ear infections, this was going to push back immunizing for 2 of the big pathogens for ear infections, right in the middle of cold and flu season.  That did not seem to make sense to me at all.  So, he did indeed get all of the usual shots for a 2 month old, as well as the Rotavirus oral immunization.  The DTaP and the Hib were all in once shot so he only got 2 shots...this presumably cut down on the preservatives too.
Overall, he is a very healthy 2 month old little boy!!!  His ears looked good-no fluid.  His lower legs are slightly bowed, but all babies have this amount of bowing because of the way they develop in utero.  (Dr. Ain had no concerns with it when we saw him last weekend.)
He will go back in to have his head circumference checked next month and then see Dr. Phelps again for his 4 month check up.  We will plan to go back to Johns Hopkins in February to see Genetics, Neurosurgery and Ortho.
Hopefully we have an UNEVENTFUL cold and flu season!!!

Trying to blog from my iPhone

Hopefully this sets up so I can blog from my iPhone...We'll see.  This is a test!